GBGM > Health & Welfare Ministries > Disability Concerns > Breaking the Sound Barrier| GBGM > Health & Welfare Ministries > Disability Concerns > Breaking the Sound Barrier |
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This page was written by Shanti Parker who had normal hearing until she was deafened at age 40 cause unkown. She thinks her warranty just expired. She had two years of silence during which time she struggled to learn speech reading and sign language. She is now a cochlear implant user.
I never thought about hearing loss until I experienced a total loss and found myself awash in a sea of silence. Here's a small sampling of what I have learned splashing out about there.
Say "Tulsa, Oklahoma." Really! Say the words, silently if you wish, but feel how each syllable forms. Now imagine yourself trying to read your own lips. Oklahoma is right out there, but Tulsa is formed with the tongue and hidden behind the teeth.
It is estimated that 50% of spoken English involves little or no movement of the lips. Not exactly great odds, are they? But it gets worse. Now say "the mad, bad pad." Those words all feel exactly the same, don't they? That means they all look exactly the same. So factor in the estimate that 50% of all English words have other words which look exactly the same or at least close enough for confusion. Now the odds are really bad... it's enough to drive you mad... I'm staying here, safe in my pad...
The term Speech Reading has replaced the old concept of lip reading because it simply describes the process better. When people with hearing loss try to pick up clues from watching a speaker's lips, they are engaged in a much more complex process than just reading what they see. They are, in fact, very busy mentally processing the bits and pieces of what they do see into their larger understanding of English word structure and the topic under discussion. It's an inexact science at best.
General speech reading ability will, of course, vary with the individual. But it will also be impacted by many factors. Is the speech reader tired? Is the lighting poor or the speaker too far away? Some speakers move their lips very little. Others have odd speech rhythm or unusual accents. Mustaches, hands in front of the face, a turned head all add to the confusion. Once you understand this, you'll find yourself making logical adjustments.
It is easy to assume that a hearing aid is for ears what glasses are for eyes. Get one prescribed for your problem, and you'll basically have normal hearing again. T'aint so.
Hearing loss often means a person loses sensitivity to sounds in certain frequency ranges, but not others. I lost the base notes in music before the treble. Turning up the volume so that I could hear the base made the treble painfully loud.
Hearing loss can also be more than just a problem with volume-- it can be one of distinction. You might say "My mother was buried,"i but I might hear/think you said "My brother was married." My congratulations would seem odd at best.
Older aids and assistive listening devices could be very hard to tolerate. They might help with the understanding of speech, but could also send the unhappy wearer up the wall when the dog crossed the linoleum floor or their spouse rattled the newspaper.
Fortunately the technology has improved and is improving by leaps and bounds. Today's computer technology is making great strides toward equipment which is "user friendly." But please remember many problems still exist. If a member of your committee is using a hearing aid or assistive listening device, resist the urge to tap your pencil on the table and shuffle your papers quietly. Take turns speaking and give visible hints as to who is currently speaking. (I often feel like I'm at a Ping Pong match trying to figure out whose lips are now moving...)
Living with hearing loss of any degree is tiring. Just following the gist of spoken communication can be exhausting. The more severe the loss, the more concentrated effort is required to stay on board.
I'm lucky to have as much auditory input from my cochlear implant as I do. My comprehension is almost 100% in most one-on-one settings. Use of an FM Assistive Listening Device allows me to function fairly well in a group. But even in the best circumstances, I must concentrate totally on listening. If I drop out for a moment into my own private thoughts, I'll lose the flow of the conversation. If I am driving or chopping veggies, it gets very hard to follow a conversation. I can't walk and chew gum at the same time any more. This is less of a problem for those whose hearing loss is moderate, but is still likely true to some extent.
Bottom line is know your audience. Watch for signs of tiredness and call for a break. Learn to be comfortable with periods of silence. Make sure changes of topics are clearly communicated. If your message isn't getting though, try saying it another way. Move your chair so your listener doesn't have to turn their head to see your face. Find a quiet area for conversation. Ask the waitperson to turn down the music. A little understanding will go a long way toward other logical acts of compassion.
One of the best question I was asked after I went deaf was "Do you like the silence?" It helped move my focus away from what I had lost to the possibilities of the life I now had to live. That life was different, but it was still life excuse the pun. You know, silence is really quite peaceful.
One direction United Methodist ministry rarely takes is that of contemplative practices. It is a shame since meditation and contemplative prayer is one of our richest Christian traditions.
Think about it. One of hardest disciplines for a beginning meditation student to learn is that of ignoring the distraction of outside sounds. Those of us with severe hearing loss can just turn off our hearing aids/devices and move directly to the next step.
Meditative practices such as Centering Prayer, which is a very old form of Christian meditation, benefit everyone. Starting a class in Centering Prayer or meditation at your church would have the added advantage of providing a rare place where hearing loss can be experienced as an advantage. What a gift! If you don't know where to start, try the following website: http://www.centeringprayer.com/methodcp.htm (link opens in a new window). A web search on the topic "Centering Prayer" lists several other resources.
