January 22, 1954--February 24, 1996
Thirteen years ago this spring, my life changed radically. A friend of mine, Charles Bergner, was diagnosed with AIDS. Like many of us in 1983, I had barely heard of AIDS. Charles was an active member of the church I attended, Washington Square United Methodist Church in New York City. We made an active decision to not only support Charles as he faced this new illness but also opened our doors to persons with HIV and AIDS in a variety of ways. We offered free meeting space, a place for memorial services, and pastoral care. I personally decided, like the church, to support Charles, to visit him, to be with him. Little did I know that my decision would lead me to where I am today, not just generally in terms of my overall ministry but quite literally where I stand right now, here in Charlotte, North Carolina.
Everyone in this room can remember a time when an awareness of AIDS entered our life. Probably most, if not all of us, can also
say that AIDS has changed our lives radically. Certainly this
was true for Debbi Hood Johnson [left] when she made some bold decisions about ten years ago to enter into ministry with people with AIDS.
She could not have known where her chosen path would lead her--
that she would gain friends who loved her and became her "family
of choice" --that she would meet and marry B. J. Johnson, her
beloved husband who died of AIDS about three years ago-- that she
would be loved and respected by people all around the world who
never met her face-to-face but had read her "I Wear a Red Ribbon"
or talked with her on electronic bulletin boards, such as CAM and
America on Line, or through Internet e-mail. Today is the first
time some of us from Debbi's Charlotte community and Debbi's
online community have met. She could not have foreseen this kind
of gathering either, at least not at the beginning of her journey
with AIDS.
As part of her witness to the world, Debbi wore the Red Ribbon proudly... and courageously, given the prejudice against people with AIDS that existed and still persists. Near the end of her life, Debbi even had the Red Ribbon tattooed on her wrist! Debbi declared, "When I wear the Red Ribbon, I am demonstrating my compassion and care for people living with HIV/AIDS...."
Debbi believed that Matthew 25 and Jesus' words to the righteous, "I was sick and you visited me" are a clear divine mandate to be in ministry with people with AIDS, to treat people with AIDS with the utmost of love and respect. In "I Wear a Red Ribbon," she challenged churches and communities to respond to Christ's call, saying:
The gay community, for more than a decade, has shown us an incredible example of what unconditional love and honest, unflinching AIDS prevention education can accomplish. What about the rest of us? Where are the mainstream churches? I have been dismayed by stories of persons picketing AIDS funerals with hateful signs or quietly asking HIV-infected families to leave their congregations so that the tithes and offerings won't diminish.I know that these hurtful actions are not the only witness of churches. Others have heeded Jesus' message in Matthew 25.... "I was sick and you visited me...."
Debbi lived out Jesus' mandate to be in ministry with people who are sick.
Let's look at this parable that is unique to Matthew and touched Debbi so deeply. Sometimes it is called the Parable of the Sheep and the Goats. The sheep symbolize people who are righteous, who make justice a part of their way of life. The goats symbolize people who are not righteous, who are not just.
Notice that the sheep and goats are defined by their actions, not their words, or even their beliefs. In the gospel of Matthew, good words are not enough to receive God's blessing; neither is acknowledging Jesus as Lord. (Clearly both the sheep and the goats acknowledge the king, who symbolizes Jesus, as "Lord," and show great respect to him.) Good words and respect for the Lord must be joined with righteous actions, works of justice.
The message of Matthew 25 is clear in terms of ministry with persons who have an illness. Righteous people visit people who are sick. Unrighteous people do not. In our day and age, Jesus would say that righteous people visit people with AIDS.
According to Matthew 25, visiting people who are sick is not something we do simply to pat ourselves on the back and make ourselves feel good. Neither is it a time to take on an air of self-righteousness and judgmentalism.
Jesus says, "just as you did it to one of the least of these, who are members of my family, you did it to me." Did you hear that radical message? Jesus says that the least of these, such as persons who are sick with HIV/AIDS, are his family--that is, they are children of God. Righteous people visit those who have AIDS as an expression of close kinship or relationship.... Debbi understood and lived this command of Jesus. Through her writing and her day-to-day actions, Debbi witnessed to the world, saying, "I carry the message that Persons Living with AIDS... are PERSONS first and foremost: persons who have families and loved ones, persons who have dreams and hopes and fears, persons who laugh and cry, persons who deserve the same respect as you and I."
But wait. Jesus' message goes even further than declaring that "the least of these" are his family. He says that whatever we do to his family members, we do to him. People who have AIDS are to be treated as if they are Jesus Christ personified. Whatever we do or do not do to people with AIDS, we do it to the Christ, to the very Presence of God on earth.
Debbi Hood Johnson treated people with AIDS as if they were the very Presence of Christ. She wrote:
People often ask me why I wear a Red Ribbon... why I, a white heterosexual female in the heart of the conservative South, would choose to take an often unpopular stand, instead of quietly going about my life.... Why do I wear the Red Ribbon? I wear it because I CAN. I am still alive, still able to carry the message about the reality and urgency of AIDS and how HIV can be prevented. I carry this message for those whose voices can no longer be heard but whose presence can still be felt.
We were not prepared for Debbi to die so soon. We believed she would be with us a while longer. Who would have thought that a car accident, rather than AIDS, would have taken her life so abruptly.
Now Debbi's voice can no longer be heard but we can still feel her presence. We have some of the words that she wrote, the photographs that she took, the cards she sent us. We have her memory.... her witness...
Now Debbi is more fully in the Presence of God, who most
certainly counts her among the sheep and calls her blessed
saying, "I was sick and you visited me..."
Nancy A. Carter
Saturday, March 16, 1996
Charlotte, North Carolina
AIDS memorials are published on CAM's web site as a free service to those who wish to remember loved ones and friends. They are personal statements by those who are bereaved and in their own words.
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